Korean Barbecue Dos and Don'ts (The Food Section)

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April 15, 2005

Korean Barbecue Dos and Don'ts

Bbq

Who could resist the multiple sensory pleasures of Korean barbecue: the spicy, salty flavors and the combination of textures and temperatures (crisp lettuce juxtaposed with succulent grilled meat and fish), not to mention the hands-on fun of going through a pile of lettuce leaves, wrapping your own individual little barbecue "sandwiches" and popping them into your mouth. And then there's the fear factor of watching an iron basket of fiery charcoal travel from kitchen to table. Just close your eyes and pray, "Please don't let the busboy slip on that errant piece of kimchi and doom us all."

At a recent dinner at Shin Chon Kalbi (43-01 Queens Boulevard) in Sunnyside, Queens, not only did we enjoy a wonderful meal of grilled short ribs and pork and a steaming bowl of bibimbap, but we were also treated to an unsolicited, though thoroughly elucidating, seminar from our waitress on how to properly eat Korean barbecue.

"I see a lot of people who don't know what they're doing," our waitress told us, rolling her eyes. Clearly bothered by the dining transgressions she sees day in and day out, she proceeded to educate us on a few Korean barbecue dos and don'ts.

Lettuce

DO tear off a small piece of lettuce ("face up," with the bottom of the rib facing down) to wrap around the freshly grilled meat and make a bite-size sandwich.

DON'T grab an entire leaf of lettuce to form a Chipotle-caliber Korean burrito.

Banchan

DO taste the complimentary assortment of banchan, small plates of kimchi, pickled vegetables, and other side dishes typically brought to the table just after ordering.

DON'T try to stuff the banchan into your barbecue/lettuce sandwich. Leave them as side dishes to savor on their own. In other words, keep the sandwich simple: lettuce, meat, bean paste, shredded scallion or leek, and garlic (see below).

Garlic

DO eat the garlic, often served in a small bowl with sliced green chiles. First, roast the garlic atop the grill, and then add a slice to your barbecue sandwich, if you are so inclined.

DON'T eat the garlic raw. Our waitress commented, without explanation, that garlic is considered by Koreans to be more healthy when it has been cooked. It also tastes better grilled, not to mention the fact that you will be doing your significant other a favor by avoiding raw garlic.

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Comments

I was eating Korean BBQ with my mom two weeks ago (I have had it many times, but always we some Koreans in tow who make sure I eat in proper Korean form) and we were also "taught" a few things by the waitress as well.

The one thing I remember clearly is that if you order two different types of meat and even if both plates of raw meat come together to the table at the same time, Don't mix the two on the same grill top. Eat one dish and then they change the grill top for the next plate of meat.

The American desire to "throw" everything together on the grill does not apply in Korean BBQ.

Posted by: Pamela at Apr 15, 2005 10:48:19 AM

I was at that restaraunt last weekend. Recieved pretty much the same lecture too. Food was excellent, I would highly recommend

Posted by: Nick at Apr 15, 2005 1:23:21 PM

whew. When I saw this link on Not Martha I thought I might find that I'd broken some really bad rules. Turns out I'm only guilty of putting small bits of panchan into my "burrito."

Posted by: becky at Apr 15, 2005 4:08:17 PM

ha, i guess my korean family has poor eating etiquette! we are prone to massive burritos, and my dad loves raw garlic. and i might put in a bit of banchan from time to time...

Posted by: el at Apr 15, 2005 9:52:46 PM

it's only when i read/hear the rules of consuming my own cuisine explained to others/me that i realize that i need to be way more suspicious of what i read about foreign food customs and etiquette.
who knows when you're bumping into/ reading/ being lectured by some uptight food schoolmarm. if you want to eat a whole leaf of lettuce eat it. we eat whole leaves of lettuce without the meat. we love lettuce. yum. if it's too big don't put it in your mouth all at once. you are not a snake, you are a person. if you want to put other stuff in it i suggest leaving the korean friends who have problems with what you put in your lettuce at home. there is an old korean saying that goes 'my lettuce can take the odd piece of cucumber, it is lettuce, fuck off.' (or something like that) i must poll my korean friend and relatives to find out how many of them have deeply held beliefs about the nutritional benefits of cooking garlic. what happens if you mix meat on a grill? i must know the answer to this. the suspense is killing me.

Posted by: kimchee at Apr 16, 2005 4:43:33 AM

I remember a small cartoon/joke book from when I was a kid..."Never eat anything bigger than your head."
I've always lived by that rule.

Posted by: Tom at Apr 16, 2005 6:30:59 PM

Best Korean BBQ in LA is of course Soot Bull Jeep at 8th and Catalina. One of the best things about it, aside from remarkable spinach banchan, is the staff never looks askance, or disaprovingly, or judgmentally, at the habits of non-Korean clientele. And the BBQ is ideal... I just came from lunch there, again.

Posted by: rob at Apr 18, 2005 6:44:56 PM

i'm fascinated: please post more about korean food. my taiwanese mother has a tendency to dismiss all non-chinese asian food as derivative, so i barely know what it's like. i'm catching up on japanese, thai, and vietnamese cuisines, but am terribly ignorant about korean food especially. thanks for the informative post.

Posted by: kirsten at Apr 19, 2005 1:45:03 AM

I have lived in Seoul for a year and a half, and I eat Korean food daily with my Korean girlfriend and other Koreans. I see Koreans eating (and preferring) garlic raw, stuffing whatever they want to in the leaves, and using the leaves whole. I've NEVER seen anyone tear off a leaf. In fact, it's a regular custom to put two different kinds of leaves together, like a green lettuce leaf and a sesame leaf (yum).

Now, there are some things I have noticed Koreans doing that I have tried myself in my attempts to assimilate:

- Eat shrimp and, if possible, crabs with their shells on

- It is okay to take one of those raw split gochujang-covered crabs and suck the meat out with gusto with your bare hands

- The rice is a base; feel free to mix whatever you want with it; throw in some chigae, some kimchi, some meat -- have FUN

- Don't blow your nose at the table

- Don't leave your chopsticks pointing up in a bowl; it's considered a sign of death to some folks

- Slurp noodles and soup loudly, especially mul naengmyeon

- Say "Mashisoyo" or "Mash'kita" a lot

- Restaurant in Korea have mirrors at the door; they're for checking your teeth for little red bits of gochugaru

Posted by: ZenKimchi at May 2, 2005 4:41:16 AM

Interesting. As in any cuisine, rules or "dos and don'ts" are a set of haphazard guidelines that should be adapted depending on particular situations. Certainly, my Korean family and friends eat raw garlic, make gigantic 'ssam' - which is what you all are talking about -, slurp, slurp with abandon and use our hands with food as if we've never heard of utensils but only in the comforts of our laid back home or restaurants with similar attitudes. We wouldn't dream of making noises in polite company, let alone use hands to touch food.

I'm always curious why people tend to look at eating customs as a set of rules. Discussions such as these tend to evolve into a limited set of stereotypes not to mention putting narrow limits on what a cuisine can be and its enjoyments. I mean, one doesn't talk rules with French haute cuisine, for example?

Posted by: db at May 2, 2005 1:22:49 PM

These comments have evolved into a very interesting discussion. The "dos and don'ts" was only a tongue in cheek way of conveying what our waitress told us. These were her own subjective eating customs, yet she presented them as ubiquitous. And, I'm glad people have pointed out that they are not.

There really are no rules, of course, but I do think many types of foods -- from a wide array of cultures -- have certain rituals/customs surrounding them, whether people actually adhere to them or not: cheese is a "no-no" on pasta with seafood, mayo on a corned beef sandwich is a shonda, lattes are only for drinking in the morning, real pasta carbonara must never have cream in it, etc.

Posted by: Josh at May 2, 2005 2:51:04 PM

It's kind of funny hearing all these observent details about galbi and how you're supposed to eat it. I'm Korean so I don't care much about it. I know galbi amazes American people. Personally, I'm sick and tired of eating Korean food every single day. I always beg my parents to take us to an Italian restaurant or at least order Dominos. I'm sick of galbi too. One time,I went to this Korean restaurant and that place's galbi tasted horrible and after that day, I got really really sick. I couldn't even eat anything. However, I've got to recommend this place called New York New York. The food there tastes great. Anything you order. There are some American style food there too. My dad when he eat the samjang( the bbq with the lettuce, etc.), he puts in raw garlic and raw scallions. Sometimes, he eats it with raw green chili peppers! I can't imagine how he eats all that! I personally hate raw garlic. You don't have to eat the garlic in the restaurants. Also, another tip: when they have the mushrooms for the grill, put the rounded part down on the grill. Then, after a few minutes, there is going to be some juice in there. You should drink that and eat the mushroom. My uncles said it was healthy for you. Just try not to spill the juice.

Posted by: Angela at May 7, 2005 11:48:32 PM

I'm gonna go along with much of the above Josh. I lived in Korea for over a year and chuck whatever you like in is the norm. I eat both raw and cooked garlic with kalbi, sam gyap sal and bulgogi. Wonder if your waitress has ever eaten the same dish in Korea? Bit daft for a waitress to give rules at a barbie anyhow, but if you're gonna give them, make them authentic, hmm?

The most important thing with Korean food I found, and I suppose this goes with any kinda food, is to enjoy each other's company. The food, the brazier, the booze are just props and social lubricators. Mind you the Korean don't need much encouragement int he lube department. A bottle or ten of Soju or Baek Seju normally helps with that. BTW - I was always told in Korea that Sam gyop sal and Soju were 'a marriage'.

Posted by: pieman at May 12, 2005 4:18:47 AM

i also tried shinchon kalbi, and had a lovely expierence.our waitress was lovely, probably the same one who gave you some clues in eating korean food. true, everyone has their dos and donts but its really your choice to follow them, and eat it any way you want to. from the infos she gave me, she recommended i eat how ever i want to but gave me the ways she likes it best.(i love mr garlic roasted).i totally recommend it.

Posted by: cathy at May 17, 2005 12:05:44 AM

great article on the do's and don'ts of eating Korean food. unfortunately, we have few Korean restuarants in Oklahoma, so my indulgence of the Korean cuisine is limited to a few business excurions to larger US cities.

Posted by: David, the man who loves Korean Barbecue recipe at Jun 23, 2005 12:19:20 PM

You can put panchan in your lettuce wrap. I am korean and we grew up eating it like that. It is all a matter of your personal preferences. It is like making korean tacos. The key is that you DONT make them really huge.

Posted by: Kittybandaid at Jun 29, 2006 3:33:00 PM

my mom is korean and my dad white. however growing up i never learned how to speak korean but i certainly could identify the food i liked but not their proper names. she left of course. and my dad meet my future step mom, who happens to be korean too concidence? i think not. but she told me that u use the chop sticks for picking the food and putting it on ur spoon full of rice. never eat off the chop stick. and she told me when u drink dont show ur bottom it's considered rude. she told me some other stuff but not with eating food. i have never heard all that stuff before when eating so for whoever cares respect their wishes and those that dont eat as u please.

Posted by: dd at Nov 9, 2006 3:16:42 PM

Wow, never eating 'banchan' off chopsticks is pretty old school! So old that I would bet if you pick 10 Koreans randomly and ask them, all 10 would say they do eat off chopsticks.

Posted by: billylee at Dec 1, 2006 10:59:23 AM

About banchan in lettuce, it depends on what the banchan is. Some banchan doesn't belong in the lettuce wrap, aka ssam. Bits of kimchi is ok. Geem is not ok. Dried daikon is not ok. Andy type of jeon is no ok. But when you have no idea and you put whatever banchan in your wrap, that's not ok.

About the raw garlic. If you actually like raw garlic, it's ok to eat it raw. Usually the ahjuhshees eat it raw because they're impatient or because it shows macho-ness to chomp on raw garlic. But at a decent sit-down restauraunt, grill the garlic. It tastes much better. But if you don't know any better and your popping raw garlic in your mouth when meat, onions and mushrooms are being grilled on your table, it just makes it look like you don't know what you're doing. Unless you really enjoy garlic raw, grill it. If you're eating with a group of men and everyone is eating the garlic raw, don't be a pansy and eat it raw.

Posted by: andrew lee at Jan 13, 2007 7:54:11 PM

i am half korean and i grew up eating korean food. the korean culture holds eating in high regard. there is a saying that goes something like "even diamond mountain can wait until after you have eaten yur meal". anyway, other thatn being served a drink first, poured to someone else, and to support your hand with the other while pouring, eat your food the way you enjoy it. especially the men are allowed to eat whichever way they want. lettuce tacos? eat it like a huge burrito and you are a snake! tomayto tomahto. enjoy your food.

Posted by: jbernard at Jan 29, 2007 3:20:14 AM

lol why do people assume "asian culture" has rules for everything? feng shui, memoirs of a geisha, etc., etc. sometimes it's obvious that you shouldn't make a big huge lettuce burrito and shove it into your mouth, but thinking that you have to observe all these exotic esoteric rules to be "asian" is insulting. not trying to bash this post (it was a good one!) but i think that's why a lot of comments were about not needing rules to eat korean food acceptably.

Posted by: jinhee at Feb 12, 2007 3:36:48 AM

well i have eaten alot of korean bbq its massive in thailand especailly in the north east (issan) part of the country where my girlfriend is from and we just eat anyway you want chicken, beef, pork, squid all on the pan with pig fat on the tip of the bbq and oil in the tray with noodles and leaves its great. tastes lovely but i cant find on here in england or on the net ahhhhhhhhh help me please

Posted by: sammilsom at Jul 30, 2007 1:37:38 PM

I agree with jinhee. You shouldn't really have to think of any "rules." Just keep the basics in mind: Be considerate. Use common sense. Don't make a fool of yourself.

Posted by: kevin at Nov 8, 2007 5:21:27 AM

It's funny reading people's perspective about eating Korean food. You can eat banchan with pretty much anything - or inside of anything for that matter. I like dabbling a bit of everything inside my lettuce wrap. But I do agree with not making it a burrito. You know how hard it is to eat BBQ like that?

Posted by: Maureen at Jan 30, 2008 1:23:38 PM

Order kalbi from us next time. :)

www.momsbbqribs.com

Posted by: Shawn at Jun 1, 2008 11:17:07 AM

I never tried korean barbeque until i started watching naruto and saw choji eat some i tried it and loved it. eat it when you get a chance

Posted by: chojiimitator at Jun 8, 2008 5:13:16 PM

Man a white man tell the world how to eat KOREAN food. Jesus I can't handle that. always gotta be telling people what to do

Posted by: James at Jun 10, 2008 8:17:42 PM

I just started a fun korean cooking show.
I would love you to check it out sometime.
Thanks.

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=FLPwMxUqbZU

Posted by: Grace at Oct 3, 2008 11:26:13 PM

Very impressive understanding of the Korean BBQ culture. You my friend have are a Korean BBQ LOVER!!!

Check out my site, rate these bad boys, and reign one King of Korean BBQ.

http://www.KingofKoreanBBQ.com

Posted by: kingofkoreanbbq.com at Oct 14, 2008 5:16:35 AM

wrong. one uptight waitress does not speak for the etiquette of an entire culture, and any food writer who takes a single experience as a source for a generalization on how to experience a food foreign to him needs to start thinking about the basic fact-checking he learned in journalism school 101.

this is the korean etiquette equivalent to saying everyone should eat spaghetti by only twirling 4-5 noodles at a time with a fork against a spoon, then eating the twirled ball in one mild bite, not dangling any noodles to be slurped up, or getting a single drop of sauce on your mouth or off of your plate. get real. just eat it how you want to eat it. as long as you're not belching up some serious garlic burps at the next table over, you'll be fine.

Posted by: david at Nov 4, 2008 12:29:22 PM

Shocking. Was your waitress even Korean? I lived in Korea for several years and I assure you it is in fact encouraged to pile whatever you want into your lettuce roll, the bigger the better! It is quite fun to try multiple variations of side dish layering. And MOST Koreans eat the garlic raw. I always had to grill it as I found it far too strong. I think even the Korean variety is stronger than what we are accustomed to in North America. Ugh, I bet she would even look down her nose at putting kimchi on the grill.

Posted by: Janet at Nov 11, 2008 10:58:44 PM

however you eat it, i am so glad that you are highlighting korean BBQ. as a korean-american, i don't have too many rules but i do generally make smaller ssam with only meat, bean paste and grilled garlic and don't add banchan. call me a purist, i guess... the only steadfast rule i have is to leave nice clothing or outerwear in the car, everything will smell like BBQ for days after... -cp

Posted by: clara at Dec 1, 2008 2:39:09 PM